Day 2 Stats

Stats written by Chaty.

The Twelve Drinking Days of Christmas, Chapter 2 (aka: The Cows Have Run Out of Cheese)



"What if we're the only ones who show up?" she asked. "What if we are all alone... just us. What if the others can't make it... or worse yet... what if they've found something better to do," as she puts her head down on the bar, her hair gently flowing, intertwined through her pint of Guinness and her tequila. "Now, now, Donna, take it easy," Tom reassured her, placing his hand on his shoulder as if to show her he was truly vested in this relationship. "I'm sure they're going to be here soon. They're just running a little late," he continued. "Maybe they got held up at the office, or traffic." Donna looks up at Tom, with a tear in her left eye, her only good eye. You see, it was 6 months to this day that she lost vision in her right eye during what was later described by prosecutors as a "freak skeet ball incident." But she couldn't think about this right now. Her mind was focused on the current situation. The fact that she felt betrayed by her friends whom all said they would meet her there. You see, deep inside she knew her relationship with Tom was on the rocks, and she was hoping for the comfort of the rest of the group to create a kind of diversion. "Don't cry," Tom told her, "we're in public. Just drink your tequila and I'm sure once everyone else shows up, you'll feel much better. Besides, Chaty's been here, we're not really here all by ourselves." But, he knew that wasn't going to stop her, nothing could have. He knew there wasn't anything he could have said at that moment to keep her tears at bay. You see, trying to stop a woman from crying is virtually impossible, much akin to telling a gun shot victim to stop bleeding. But Donna, who's heart was bleeding, needed to change the subject... to move on... if only for this brief moment. "Hey Chaty, what year were you born?" Donna inquired, trying to think of something to talk about. "1964, he claimed." "Golly," exclaimed Tom, "you look great for your age. Your skin is so soft. What do you bathe in? Moisturizer?" he jokes. Chaty gave a loud chuckle. The type of uncomfortable chuckle one would give when they've realized that their secret is out but can't quite admit it freely yet. "Yeah, bathe in moisturizer, that's funny... yeah..." Tom unknowingly had it half right. For the true secret to Chaty's youthful looking appearance wasn't the moisturizer he would bathed in frequently, it was the mix of herbs, plant oils, and fermented yak blood combined with the moisturizer that did the trick. It was an old family secret. And it needed to remain a secret. If Tom kept pressing the issue Chaty might be forced to use violent means. He reaches onto the bar to grab a fork, the closest thing to him at that moment and clenches it like a gladiator would grip a spear to fight a hungry tiger.

Luckily, the back door to the parking lot opens and in walks several other friends who've come drink and dine and with Tom and Donna. Chaty puts the fork down. Donna's eyes light with joy. Finally, the break she had been looking for. Her diversion has arrived. Tom just sat there with the same expression he's had all night long. Had he known he was about 20 seconds from meeting his demise, it's an almost guarantee that Tom's expression would have shown some type of change. G-man, his wife, and their child walk in and within 42 seconds of their arrival have a table, a large pizza, and coloring books. Everyone orders another round from the sullen looking bartender. Donna fights back the tears, and turns to everyone with a smile on her face and takes a sip of the sweet nectar that is her tequila. Shortly thereafter Laura walks in with that kind of effervescent charm that strikes people to say to themselves, "wow, so that's what effervescent charm is. I was always confused. I've heard the expression, but never actually knew what it was." And this was all in her plan to begin with. She would stun people with this effervescence and while they were dazed, trying to comprehend everything, she was secretly going through their pockets and taking their money, their credit cards, their medication, or anything else she could get her hands on. As she was going through Ska's wallet and pulling out the three $1 bills he has, Tom catches her. "Busted!" she thinks to herself, "how do I get out of this? My effervescent charm must not work on him... I know exactly what I have to do." So she takes her glass and smashes it on the bar, shattering it to tiny pieces. Remarkably, one of the pieces flies several feet down the bar and lands in Lou's mouth as he biting down on a slice of pepperoni pizza. Lou spits it out into his hand, thinking it's a chip of his tooth. Tom forgets all about Ska's wallet in a frenzy to clean up the mess.

Several minutes and 14 pizzas later, Tamps walks in wearing a t-shirt that says, "I (heart) Fezziwig's." The reason he showed up so late was because he was struggling to put together an outfit for the night. He was torn between the previously mentioned t-shirt or his, "I (spade) My Dog" t-shirt, or his favorite, "I (club) Crack Pipe Larry" t-shirt. Everyone got a great laugh out of this, but, the night was still young and the beer taps were still flowing and there was were still things that needed to be done. I'm not sure if it was the tequila Donna had been drinking or the cocaine that JoJo's puts in their pork roll sandwiches, but Donna told herself that she was going to fight for what she believed was the right thing to do. So, she finished her last bite of pork roll, grabbed Tom and licked his nose. She knew someone had to do it, and she knew she was the one to step up and do it. "There!" she said, "I did it! Someone needed to be licked inappropriately and now it's done!"

The conversation turns to talk of the future, to a hopefully brighter time, where things will be better, relationships will be fixed, teeth will be mended, and pockets won't be picked. "Where are we going to go for Day 3 festivities?" everyone quietly ponders to themselves. Several ideas are pitched, but, in true TDDoC tradition, it doesn't matter, we are going to where ever E-man wants us to go. There was much debate, but in the end, the E-man proclaimed that we are going to Big Al's Airport Inn (really called Al's Airport Inn) which isn't actually "in" the Trenton airport, but more so "near" the Trenton airport. Which leads many of us to ponder why it's not called "Al's Airport Out," or "Al's Near the Airport Inn." And it's really not in Trenton either, it's technically in Ewing. So, I guess we can call it "Al's Near the Trenton Airport which is actually in Ewing Airport Inn."

Al's Airport Inn
636 Near Tavern Road
Trenton, NJ 08628
(609)883-5252

See below for details. (Those who've had to take out loans from Night 1 will be happy to review the prices of Al's)

And now for the legal mumbo-jumbo

Please check out the website for photographic evidence and previous days stats.
http://tddoc.blogspot.com/
You can access the website via the internet (that have that on computers now).

List of Day 2 attendees:
Ska
Big Lou
Tamp
Dave Uvegas
Cairo
Cairo's Cousin Joe
Eman
G
Su
Julian
Goettle
Laura (Carlson)
Bobo
Donna
Chaty (formerly known as OJMarc)

Points total:
Eman 2
Ska 2
Gman 2
Su 2
Goettle 2
Bobo 2
Tamps 2
Donna 2
Yvette 1
BB 1
Pods 1
Tmac 1
Julian 1
Scugi 1
Mrs. Scugi 1
Big Lou 1
Uvegas 1
Nancy HP 1
Milot 1
DMile 1
Mindy 1
Dino 1
Jeff 1
Chaty 1
Lisa Eman 1
Trent 1
Billionaire Pat Worth 1
Millionaire Brandy 1
Randy 1
Laura 1
Neufeld 1
Lauren 1
Anna 1
Beth 1
Yvette(non Goettle) 1
Dorian 1
Melanie 123 1
Jennifer 1
Cairo 1
Cairo's cousin Joe 1