Day 6 stats

Day 7: Princetonian Pub Crawl. Start at Triumph. Later spots likely to be Sotto (formally the Annex), Winberrie’s, Alchemist & Barrister. Use cell phones as required, or, if you want to find Goettle (only American under the age of 85 without one), just go outside and yell his name really loud. Day 7 rumored to include 2006 debut of TMac and Buffy. Rumor also has it that Kaden will be offering up his face to Buffy for a "throwing of the drink".



Day 6: Big Fish, the lovely Route 1 corridor, NJ

Attendees:
big lou, illman, beth (illman's friend), kimchick, big al, big al's pat, sonya, OJ Mark, bobo, g, su, colleen, eman, ska, tamps, rose, dorian, donna, goettle, yvette, polo, scugi, mertz, stu, arunkone, milot, dmile, billionaire pat worth, guffar, assorted other big al buddies

Dang it, we gave Megan a point on Day 1. I gave Danielle a point for last night. Paddei?

On to the stats. A Mr. Richard Fader Hawker of Fort Lee NJ writes in to the TDDoC blog and says: "Where are the Antics? Has anyone torn something off a wall? Has anyone been thrown up against a backstop? Has anyone bit or licked something inappropriate? Has anyone SET SOMETHING ON FIRE ! ?"

Alas, Mr. Hawker, the unfortunate answer is No. That is, until last night. The antic logjam was finally broken when Crack Pipe Larry showed up at 4PM prior to a night on the town with the youth of St. Ignatatius Girl's School for the Empowerment of Descendents of Brooklyn on his brand new Harley, which he drove up the steps of the Princeton Market Fair, through the glass doors, and down the hall. Upon skidding to a stop in front of the Starbucks, he ordered an iced pumpkin evergreen grande latte, then threw it in the face of the barista while yelling "Down with Columbian oppressive pigs!!". He then set the Starbucks on fire and drove down to the Barnes and Noble, where he proceeded to pull of his chaps and leather pants and then run around the store naked, pulling books off shelves willy nilly, yelling "Barnes and Noble $ucks without the Gman working there" and other spiced political rhetoric. He then ordered another iced pumpkin evergreen grande latte at the B&N Starbucks, but this time, he drank it. He then pulled a copy of the Magna Carta off the shelves and spit the entire contents of the iced pumpkin evergreen grande latte onto it, shouting "Down with European oppressive pigs!!". After setting the Barnes and Noble on fire, he proceeded to rape and pillage his way down the hall back to the Big Fish, where he concluded the rampage with a French Martini and a ride on the very large Big Fish perched atop the bar.

Unfortunately, all of this concluded by 4:09PM, and Crack Pipe was safely home by 4:30 catching the end of Tony Danza on the Dr. Phil show. There were no identified witnesses; the facts of this incident are only culled from internet blog sites.

Then, once the fire department put out most of the burning building, the other people showed up. Among 2006 rookies making their first appearance were Arunkone (or El Weako, as many of his lady friends call him), Lisa Illman, and her friend Beth. Lisa is YET STILL ANOTHER present or former Americom employee with many, many more points this year than Crack Pipe Larry. Illman and Beth were originally on the opposite side of the bar, creating a bit of a splinter group. Splinter group discussion ensued until the Gman showed up and began throwing a tantrum about splinters and sphincters until all people agreed to combine into a single group.

Arunkone mentioned to me that he had a picture of me hanging on the wall in his office. Oddly enough, I really don't doubt that.

Much discussion was held about the potential that the Nottingham Tavern offered as a future TDDoC spot. Unfortunately, much of the group feels that once they removed the piano, and the liklihood of a reprise of Pods' piano solo in 1987 (which resulted in the bartender yelling at him "OK, That's ENOUGH!") was gone, there was no point. However, Goettle would like to stress to the ladies that despite the fact that most of the employees and patrons of this establishment have severe dental abnormalities, this doesn't mean that they aren't nice people.

We got a surprise visit from Polo who was only able to make a cameo due to some urgent seamstessy sort of need at her house. Apparently, her home country was staging some sort of revolution and her immediate assistance was needed to stitch up a flag or something. She apparently has plans to return to the Tap Room in Princeton next Thursday to see if the chalk outline from her body on the ladies' room floor is still there from Day 7 last year.

Speaking of flags, FLAGGED! Check out the pictures and see if you can figure out what BIG LOU's favorite view of the night was. This had been immediately proceeded by BIG LOU getting a bare belly flash, the first time he remembers ever getting one of those without an exchange of dollar bills being involved.

Towards the end of the night, as a clear sign that the employees were interested in going home, all of the sudden the sound system started playing dance-floor smashes like "It Never Rains in Southern California" and the Backstreet Boys "I Want it That Way". During the latter, Goettle grabbed Bobo's hand and asked him to dance, but Bobo was so tired and full that all he could offer was a "No" instead of the usual insults to Goettle's manhood. Mertz then spoke to the manager and covinced him to insert a Megadeath CD, and then, as he had during the TDDoC in 2002, incited the crowd into a wave of violent slamdancing.


Points Tally

Ska 6
Rose 4
E-man 6
Bobo 3
G-man 6
Scugi 6
Tamp 6
Kaden 1
Tool 1
Goettle 6
Mertz 2
BB 1
The Other Joe (OJ) 3
The Other Joe’s Brother (OJ Mark) 3
The Swede 1
Dorian 4 (+1*)
Donna 6
Billionaire Pat Worth 3
BIG LOU 5
M. Taddie 1
Su 3
Cory 1
Julian 1
Lisa Eman 1
Trent 1
Kimchick 4
Cheryl 2
MD 3
Larry Not Crack Pipe (LNCP) 2
Mel 3
Jeff 1
Stu 4
Randy 2
Laura 2
Katherine 1
Arunkone 1
BIG AL 3
Megan 1
Sonya 3
Guffar 1
Tytla 2
Uji 1
Rob (not Bob) 1
Porsche Linda 1
Milot 3 (+1*)
Neufeld 1
East Coast Julie 1
Blair 1
Tony Giacobbe (1*)
Roy O 2
Maria Scugi 1
Curt 1
Bennie 1
Big Al’s Pat 2
Alyssa 1
DMilot 3
Colleen 2
Janna 1
Robin 1
Polo 1
Illman 1
Illman friend Beth 1
Yvette 2
Danielle 1
assorted other Big Al friends 1
Crack Pipe Larry 0

* = Illegitimate EC point from west coast participation (debate is on-going)