MUTO

MUTO a wall-painted animation by BLU from blu on Vimeo.

Edison Greenwaaaaay!

Conveyor Bob and I opted out of the DTBDRHH and instead rode the not-yet-ready Edison Greenway. Starting where the Greenway will cross over U.S. Route 1 behind the A&P in Tano Mall (photo above), we followed the old Lehigh Valley Railroad -- "route of the black diamond" -- grade and service road for about 7 miles. Mud, sometimes colored blue and orange (superfund, baby), big puddles, old factories & warehouses and a forest. Yes, kids, a forest in Edison. This is the area surrounding the Dismal Swamp, and the Triple C Ranch -- that freaked us out. WTF is this farm doing here? Goats, horses, chickens -- right in the middle of the 4th largest city in New Jersey!




The LVRR's Perth Amboy branch had a stop in Metuchen, then continued on to South Plainfield. Very cool trail, which will continue south toward the Woodbridge Center Mall. We returned to Metuchen via blacktop, passing by the Metuchen Golf & Country Club. Fuck golf.

New Jersey if full of irony. Concrete and dirt. Trucks and bicycles. Band-Aids and Tomatoes.

This is, after all, the Garden State.

Had a Blue Moon afterwards. That's when I realized it was a good thing to opt out of the big event. I can't ride buzzed.

Ghost Rider

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DT's Burning Daylight Rolling Happy Hour #8

Dave Tampellini's Burning Daylight Rolling Happy Hour (DTBDRHH) is going to be held on Friday June 20, 2008.

Here is how this works:

Meet at Washington's Crossing Park in New Jersey at the parking lot by the river, bicycles ready, at 5:00 PM EDT. We will ride north on the tow path on the New Jersey side of the Delaware River. The goal, as per custom, is to ride to Lambertville and New Hope and stop in several of the establishments for refreshments and then ride back to Washington's Crossing before it gets completely dark.

Well...this is a goal and I don't think anyone has ever made it back before dark. This is a rain or shine event. Please mark you calendars.

And if you don't have a bicycle, or can't ride, or simply refuse to ride, that is fine too. You should come out anyway; we would love to see you. Updates, rules, venues, and hazard locations will be e-mailed in the coming days.

Let me know if you would like to be removed from this mailing; also you can tell anyone and everyone you know about it. We would love to see them too.

My best to you all, and eff Larry,

Ska


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Dean Martin & John Wayne

This is a good one.

Belated But Glorious Day 12 Stats

Day 12 at Wildflowers - Pennington, NJ

TDDoC 2007 went out with a whimper - I think most were very tired and
were grateful the end had come.

_Day 12 Attendees:
_Laura, Chaty, Debbie, Gman, Cory W, Ska, L Eman, Yo, Cory M, Mertz,
Eman, Trent, Su, Julian, Yvette, Geottle (with new cell phone), Bobo,
Tamps, Art

Twas the day before Xmas, in Pennington this time
Friggin' Conte's was closed, they won't get a dime

Day 12 finally here, we've had enough of this crap
So many hungover, so let me recap:

Day 1 brought us together, like a gathering storm
In anticipation for the TDDoC, to take it's form

At a place called Salt Creek, we spent lots of dough
And later On the Border, where Windex shots did flow

Day 2 at JoJos, an awesome pizza joint
Numerous pies were devoured, just off of five points

Day 3 flew to Al's Airport, a hole in the wall
Then to the Firken, for real food and hockey brawl

Day 4 at Nottingham Tavern, or was it City Streets?
Some of us got derailed, thanks to those stats of Pete's

Day 5 crossed into icy Pennsyltucky, the village of Newtown
Cigarette smoke was inhaled, our lungs tarred and brown

Day 6 saw the return of the King and Queen, in Princeton they did crawl
Merriment abounded o'er this eve, but alas the King had a fall

Day 7 means we're over the hump, like All Stars in need of a towel?
While war was being waged, deep inside Gman's bowel

Day 8 brought us perverted karaoke, at the Americana Diner
And the debut of the Big Lou band, what could be finer

Day 9 at Big Fish, some conversation we did carry
Can't think of a better line, almost forgot to say eff Larry!

Day 10 with the finish line in sight, at some place called Bar One
Stats are getting mighty thin, TDDoC almost done

Day 11 crossed the Delaware, to heave a Havana
In the gay old boro, was that CPL smoking a banana?

Day 12 finally arrived, Wildflowers was a good choice
Suggested by Tamps, let us all rejoice

A cell call was placed, the phone passed round
Each of us yelling Suck!!, or Eff Larry!! - how very profound

So here's to the 6 iron men/women, and their 12 point total
It's time to wrap presents, even a cell phone for Goettle!

But all good things come to an end, yes even drinking beer,
eff Larry again and rest up for next year

TDDoC Day 12 - afterthought Stats

Attendees (for all I know)
Dorian
Donna

Wildflowers at 2572 Pennington Rd(Rte 31) in Pennington, NJ, 08534. 11:30

Very useful information, none of which I wrote down, and so in the car
trying to get there all I could recall was called Wildflowers and it was
somewhere in "F**k**g" Jersey. After a spirited session of "I though YOU
wrote the address down!" with Donna, in desperation I (no, not stop and
ask directions) punched in Wildflowers in my Magellan GPS navigator, and
to my surprise, it came back with "Which one? - New Hope or Pennington?"
Reasoning tha New Hope was off limits after an internation incident the
prior Friday involving lawyers guns and money, and the fact that
Pennington was closer. Arrived at 1:45, to find....no sign of Tddoc.

No Goettle taking a thousand pictures, no Gary/Melanie unit, no CPL not
being there anyway, no BPL to mooch a drink off of. But sadly there was
no evidence that a TddoC was even there, no burned out husk of a
building, no broken bar stools, no bodies in the parking lot, no Bobo
eating, no "F**k PA" in the men's room(I assume that F**k means
"Fantastik"), no missing glassware.

So we decide to sit at the bar, and wait...and wait...and wait...for a
bartender to show up. Donna took advantage of the time to read off all
the labels on the TVs for the football games on the prior Sunday, while
I placed a "where?" call to Tamps. Tamps answers and tells me everyone
was there and left before 1:30 - I ask since when is any TddoC event
less than 2 hours to which he replies that was always the case at
Conte's - which I dispute because I recall being at Conte's until well
after 2:00 one year - of course I might have been by myself at the time
then too.....

Anyway a barmaid finally appears (apparently had to go to Canals to get
a particular brand of Whiskey for a watered down drink a patron had
foolish ordered and whose skeletal remains the barmaid set the drink
down in front of) and Donna and I managed to order a couple of Smiddicks
(Smithwicks in American) on draft from the Tap RIGHT IN FRONT OF US and
then wait anoter 10 minutes to actually get. We savored our 2 beers each
and gazed at the other poor souls who have nothing to do on X-mas eve
but go to a bar in search of that special something - Love, Meaning,
Happiness, or a coveted TddoC point - even a provisional one, but even
more hopefully a controversial one, to carry into the New Year.__

_TDDoC 2007 Final Points total:_

Eman 12
Ska 12
Gman 12
Su 12
Goettle 12
Tamps 12
Big Lou 9
Julian 8
Chaty 8
Milot 7
Donna 8
Dorian 6
Scugi 6
Lisa Eman 6
Trent 6
Mosso 5
Laura 5
Yo 5
Mertz 5
Yvette 5
DMile 4
Billy Bob 4
Billionaire Pat W 4
Bobo 4
Neufeld 4
Pods 3
Randy 3
CSI Stu 3
Big Al 3
Mrs. Scugi 3
Conway 3
Felicia (G Fam) 3
Rose 2
Millionaire Brandy 2
Jeff 2
Bode 2
CPL 2
Uvegas 2
Jana 2
Katherine 2
Big Al’s Pat 2
Liz 2
EC Julie 2
Cory G 2
C Mertz 2
Tmac 1
Lallie 1
Nancy HP 1
Mindy 1
Dino 1
Caitlyn (Brandy daughter) 1
Mini G (Brandy son) 1
Lauren 1
Anna 1
Beth 1
Yvette (non Goettle) 1
Melanie 123 1
Jennifer 1
Cairo 1
Cairo's cousin Joe 1
Tony Sal 1
Steve (Chaty's Friend) 1
Alli 1
Kentucky Iris 1
Szwech 1
Jim (Charming) 1
El Chorba 1
Chorba 1
Laura Chorb 1
Brooke (Charming) 1
Dan (Charming) 1
Hop Girl Suzanne 1
Darling Niki (Charming) 1
Ken (Charming) 1
Chuck D 1
Chris A 1
Sage 1
WC Julie 1
Robinmandm 1
Sandor M 1
The Swede 1
Joe Willie 1
The Mechanic 1
Jean C 1
Don (Emans Friend - EF) 1
Lisa (EF) 1
Jenna (EF) 1
Keith (BigLousKid - BLK) 1
Rachel (BLK) 1
Randy (ChatysBitchAssFriend CBAF) 1
Kaden 1
Colleen 1
Dex 1
Melissa (Polo friend) 1
Bernadette (Polo friend) 1
Porsche Club Linda (Bright Eyes) 1
Polo 1
Liz C 1
Danielle 1
Larry Not Crack Pipe 1
MD 1
Mel 1
Ben Mcm 1
Alexis the Santino barkeep 1
Blair M 1
Sharon (2005 Club 10) 1
Debbie (Chaty friend) 1

2007 TDDOC Post-Season Awards

Blink and You’re Gone Award – Dex, for his appearance on Day 8 at the Americana. He popped into the room, shook someone’s hand, and was gone. Point! Wait, it seemed like every night I blacked out between 8 and 10PM. Maybe he was actually there for 2 hours and I just didn’t realize.

Twelve-Pack Award – In the “That’s not news” department, Goettle made all 12 days. For a change of pace, Gman opted not to have any bodily organs removed and made all 12. So did Su, Tamps, Ska, and Eman.

Coveted Purple Moose Award – I’m not really sure what this is, and no one else is either. Let’s keep it that way.

Performance Enhancing Drug Suspicion – Su, who nearly doubled her career points in one year, while simultaneously managing an infant and a series of incomprehensible odors from the person sleeping next to her. You don’t think a person can just do this without a little juice, can you?

Rookie of the Year Award – Mosso, for a mind-bending 5 days. How he found the time to break away from his postage stamp collection, we’ll never know.

Rookie of the Day Award – The mechanic. He really, really wanted to be Rookie of the Year, and drank about 12 days worth of alcohol during the TDDOC events. The only thing was that he was only there for one night. Good start, mechanic! Need more quantity and less quality next year. Or the other way around or something. Your rookie eligibility is still intact!

Most Embarrassing Moment – I’d rather not say, but if you want more information, Goettle will be happy to tell you about it, show you pictures, and maybe even draw some sketches.

Hey, Bud, Whatcha Got Under There? Award – No one, thankfully, did any exploration into what was lurking in the dark under Joe Willy’s kilt. Or maybe someone did and he just doesn’t remember.

Most Unlikely Attendee Award – Robinmandm, for going from a simple email saying “I got dropped from distribution, can I get back on”, to a “Who the heck is Robinmandm, I can’t remember”, to a google search, to a picture, to a TDDOC career stats search, to a Princeton Pub Crawl call to her home, to actual attendance. Nice work. This kind of Christmas miracle never could have happened with 1997’s technology.

Bury the Hatchet Award – (tie) Bobo and Goettle, for peacefully enjoying a post-game meal together on Day 3 without anyone’s manhood being assaulted, and Alli and Yo, for re-enacting the famous scene of Yo drinking water at the bar and Alli asking him “What, are you a p*ssy?” at City Streets.

Most Hated Place Award - Bobo for Salt Creek Grille. Just try having a conversation with Bobo without him jumping into a fit of rage spewing expletives about the Salt Creek Grille. Did anyone else have a problem with it? Not that I know of. Do they serve food? Their web site and menu suggests so. Do they serve alcohol? I'm certain that they do. I think he might hate it because G's parking light on his truck might have been damaged by their valet drivers. Or because he hated the band even more than Eman. Or because he knew he had to get us out of there to avoid missing the Windex shots at OTB. Regardless, if someone suggests the Salt Creek Grille next year, rest assured that a hatchet will never be buried with Bobo. This just in....opening night 2008 at Chili's.

Grandma’s Home Cooking Award – Al’s Airport Inn, for serving up those microwave pierogies just like the microwave that you have at home….only hotter.

American Chiropractic Society “Don’t Do This” Award – Goettle, for risking serious neck misalignment with his insistence on always getting the people set in the picture, and then cricking his neck back at a 90 degree angle to increase the lens field of view by 0.001 degrees.

Best Rendition of a Christmas Song Sung Karaoke Style – None. Honorary Mention: Big Lou, Goettle, Eman. I’m not sure who’s monotone singing voice can be heard clearly in the video snippet captured on Goettle’s camera, but Eman surely will not be appearing anytime soon on American Idol.

Licking Something Inappropriately Award – Donna, for taking the guidelines to heart and licking Eman’s nose. Eman would have strongly preferred that Donna’s review of that particularly event was not “it felt fuzzy”, but if that’s the way that her tongue feels to her, that’s Dorian’s problem.

California 3, Crack Pipe Larry 2 – Final score of the California/Crack Pipe Larry game. Total miles traveled out of way to attend: California approximately 18,000, Crack Pipe Larry less than 1.

“How Could They Do This to Us?” Award – Charlie Brown’s on Route 1 in West Windsor, for remodeling or something during the TDDOC. DON’T they KNOW that that is our traditional Day 1 stop? Sure, it really $ucks, but it’s OUR $ucky Day 1 place.

Pass the Torch Award - Chaty, for showing some youthful vigor in returning in 2007 with a vengeance in his sophomore year and bringing out several friends in the process. Never mind that fact that the friends and his girlfriend all had the same "Why are you hanging out with these old losers?" look on their faces. Chaty didn't care. It's amazing how youthful he is considering that he was born in 1964 like many of us.

Tell It Like It Is Award – Graffiti was observed on the men’s bathroom stall wall in Isaac Newton’s that said “F*ck PA”. You can’t tell me that wasn’t from someone in our group. You know who you are. Fess up. Someone from PA please return the favor in NJ next year.

End of An Era – Goettle got a cell phone, finally, during the TDDOC. He’s now available to give and receive “WHHHYYYYY?????” calls. You really don’t think he wanted it for any other reason, do you?

Century Marks – Ska hit 100 career points on Day 5 at Newton’s. If you didn’t buy him a beer that night, shame on you. Buy one for me next time to make yourself feel better. Gman and Eman hit 100 career points on Day 9 at Big Fish. No one has the capability to hit 100 in 2008, so feel free to forget about this for a while. If you only have one career point so far, don’t be discouraged. With a little bit of dedication you could be at the century mark in early December 2015.

Quickest to Annoy the Family Award – Eman, for being greeted at home by his wife on Day 2 with the statement “I HATE the TDDOC!”.

Nickname Proclamation – Yes, everyone wants a nickname, and everyone wants a cool nickname, but we can’t all be Crack Pipe Larry. Well, we could, but we just choose not to. However, in trying to compile the career point totals, it’s been discovered that names like Bob and Mike make it very difficult to keep track. Therefore, in the future, nicknames are going to be flying off of the shelves. Just don’t be bummed though if yours is “Tamps’ friend Jim’s co-worker Mary”. To escape that, you’re just going to have to break, steal, or have inappropriate relations with something.

Most Ridiculous 2008 TDDOC Prediction – Big Lou meets Paris Hilton at a charity benefit for house pets with chafing in their inner thighs (both sets). They stay in touch, and he convinces her to come out Day 1. She ends up attending all days, is the 2008 Rookie of the Year, and Big Lou ends up in People magazine as one of the “100 Hottest Hunks”.

This Bar Rocks, I Can’t Believe We Missed It Awards – Nottingham Tavern, Firkin’ Tavern, Katmandu, Triumph, Tir Na Nog, Fezziwig’s, Ivy, Tiger’s Tale, HOB Tavern, etc. Yes, we know that these are all better than every place that we went, and they all have better food, cheaper drinks, and more attractive people for Goettle to photograph. Except Fezziwig’s….Tamps really hates that place and he doesn’t hate anything. But we didn’t go to any of these places, so live with it. Next year, fight harder to go there. You’re probably right.